Monday, August 24, 2009


My son is rough. He likes to jump, tackle, wrestle, and pick on his older sister. I believe I will have my hands full, for the rest of my life. The thing is, though, I had a little brother also--who was very much like my son, and I was the big sister he liked to pick at.

Today, as I could see the frustration on my daughter's face, after Jaxen chased her around the kitchen--I decided to let her in on my little secret. I told her that I had a baby brother, who picked on me when I was younger--but, I learned a very good 'defense mechanism'- I learned to laugh at him- *well, for me--and my brother who was 5 years younger instead of just 2--it was honestly very funny when he would go after me...*

She looked at me puzzled, when I told her to laugh at her brother-when he pinched/poked/picked on her. I told her that by laughing, she would probably get on his nerves more than if she fought back, and she wouldn't get in trouble, but when mommy realized her brother was misbehaving-he would get into trouble. The idea seemed to sit well with her, and it didn't take long for her to give it a little try.

I heard her force a laugh, and then I saw it make Jaxen mad-- and go after her a little more-- as I watched, I began to think, that maybe this was the wrong thing to tell her. But, she hung in there laughing, and I corrected him for his behavior. This went on all day long, as I heard forced laughs, until eventually Jaxen would just give up on picking on her.

The best part of the whole plan was, that I didn't have to hear bickering, screaming, squealing--only laughing. As a mother, this is a whole lot more relaxing than the latter. Did he pick on her less? Probably not. Did she fight back? In a way, but not in a way that would get her in trouble. Will I regret this advice later in life? Maybe, or maybe not--depends on who she laughs at I guess.

Later on, she did ask me about how my little brother picked on me--and I told her a couple of stories--and she asked me if it was hard to laugh, when the things he did hurt. I told her sure, it did hurt--but, I just pretended like it didn't bother me-

Little brother, if you are reading this-- thanks for teaching me to laugh at your frustration :)-- and thanks for growing out of throwing things at me, even if you didn't grow out of picking on me....oh, and Alexis is not happy with the black eye you gave me as a kid!

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