Monday, December 8, 2008


We recently moved into a old, Victorian house---and needless to say--It is HUGE.  So, I spend my days running up and down 4 sets of stairs to chase after my favorite son, Jaxen.  I feel like I am going in circles, but on different levels.

If there is a ruckus of some sort, I must go see what is causing the ruckus--
If there is an odd silence, I must go see why there is a silence, because that can only mean one thing--TROUBLE.
Not to mention, the daily chores of laundry, picking up toys, cooking, picking up more toys, doing more laundry...

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being in this old house, and having the opportunity to raise my kids, even for a short while, in this old home filled with character and history.  And, I am sure my butt and legs could use the workout!  I just find myself, thoroughly exhausted-- and with a long to-do list, that never quite seems to get checked off.

So, with all this running around and up and down--how do I stay centered?  It is in those fleeting moments, that I will call mommy-bonding moments.  All mothers know what these are, because they come when you really need them, and you always wish they would last a little longer.  They are the moments that I would never trade for a million Victorian homes.  

One of my favorite examples of this experience is when Jaxen, crawls into my lap, and snuggles in, his warm and chubby fingers and hand resting on mine.  His breathing slows and becomes more relaxed.  You can actually see his eyelids becoming heavy, as he struggles to keep them open.  He must be tired from all the running too, because his eyelids win in a matter of seconds.  His little body radiates warmth and love like you could never imagine.  And, it is at this  moment that everything in the world becomes crystal clear.  My mind begins to slide back into perspective and not one single thing could ruin it.  (except for his sister, waking him up). 

It is at this moment, that I know exactly why I became a mother, and why I could never be as happy as I am, without my two children.  This moment brings me happiness, peace and new sight in one swift wave, and I am blessed to be swept up within it.  I consider myself one of the luckiest mothers around to be able to experience my children day in and day out--selfishly keeping these wondrous moments to myself. 

So, yes I am exhausted at the end of every day.  But, there is no other way, I would rather have it-- Afterall, that is what coffee is for. 

1 comment:

NvRuNdRsTm8 said...

Coffee... and cocaine